After the excitement of finding my first gecko, I decide to explore at night. See if I can see the reflected eyeshine of another gecko, a possum, a bat, or a spider. To do this, I need a light. So I dig around in my carry-on bag, because that’s where I threw all the little shit left over from home. I didn’t really unpack my life yet, except to make a new clothes carpet. I find my trusty mag-light, right next to the trusty Durex and lube.
Wait-a-fucking-second. How did that get on the plane? They scanned my bags going through security and customs. They pulled out my friend’s water bottle. They pulled out my bag of chocolate. They catch all liquids, but they couldn’t find a tube of fucking Wet?
Pathetic. I could’ve been a goddamn terrorist, and they’d have missed me. Its not like my socks are made out of lead. No, security is just that dense. But I suppose the new lack of security I feel is better than having that bulldyke customs lady ask me to explain what I’m doing with this oh-so-familiar bottle.
Joining the mile-high club, of course.
1 comment:
In my gallivanting around the world this summer, I accidentally smuggled a full water bottle and a container of hand sanitizer through airport security. Also, my travel partner had a backpacker's bag with a wire mesh frame, making it x-ray proof, as her carryon. It only got searched by hand once out of the 4 times we went through airport security...
We also talked to a disgruntled airport security officer who openly said there was no reason for the liquid-container rules other than to be a pain in the ass to travelers.
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