I always wake up to spam. In modern society, this is a fact of life. But alas, a diamond in the rough. StudyAbroad.com is looking for students to keep blogs on their travels. The lucky sonofabitch will have his or her blog on BlogAbroad.com and win $500 for their trouble.
Seemed like a cakewalk. Most people I know love this blog, so why wouldn’t the general public? My narcissism assured my victory. I’d fill out their form, write the 300 word essay, and point them here. A little copy and paste for half a grand? Life is good.
But I never applied. I read the rules first.
- You must be atleast 18 and in good academic standing. Check.
- You must post atleast 3 times a week. Check.
- You must post atleast 3 pictures a week. No check, but no problem.
- You must reply to atleast 3 comments a week. Like I said, cakewalk.
But the next one put a slight drizzle on my victory parade.
- Throughout the semester, we will be providing you with a few small tasks (such as taking a picture in front of the Coliseum with your StudyAbroad.com T-shirt). You will be asked to complete them and share your adventure on the blog.
Now, I don’t mind being a human billboard. We all do it, willingly, and pay extra money for the privilege. I really couldn’t care if my t-shirt said Express or StudyAbroad.com.
The problem is the missions. Australia is not like Rome. You don’t hop on a bus to the ancient ruins. They’ll ask me to pose with Ayer’s Rock or the Sydney Opera House. Hopping on a bus to these tourist spots costs more than the money they give me.
But I could forgive these transgressions. Maybe it’s worth seeing Sydney or Uluru. What stopped me cold was the final stipulation.
- We definitely are not looking for inappropriate content (expletives, prejudices, chronic negativity, sexually explicit content, etc.)
Fuck those yeasty cunts. Without that, I wouldn’t even have a blog. Needlessly vulgur, consistently prurient, and gloriously cynical, that’s how I choose to live my life and write my blog. Censorship is not worth 500 dollars in blood money. Suck my dick.
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1 comment:
if it weren't for the expletives, prejudices, chronic negativity, sexually explicit content, etc, then i definately wouldn't look forward to reading your blog. I've even read some exerpts aloud to some study friends because i find it entertaining. Though, I think you could up the photo uploads and comment replies :p
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